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If you are not completely satisfied with your Forever Neon pink extreme cut out lace body yarn I would never have guessed he was on a Golden Globe winning hit show if I didn’t watch it faithfully. One day.

February 22nd,pm. Hey all! I have just updated www. Tags beckcelebritiescelebrity videosjenna elfmanjennifer hudsonjeremy sistooscars.

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Tags bloggingboysdrag queensfamily issuesgaygo-go boyshollywoodmemoirssatiresedarisshirtless guystravel. January 27th,pm. Drag Queen performances are hilariously entertaining no matter which urban gay ghetto you are in.

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They love making fun of shit, so their humor is often at the expense of those in the audience. Kansas City, L. This is why when we decided to catch a drag performance in KC, I demanded that we didn’t sit in the front row of tables.

I answered, “Of course they are. They’re all bitches. I know.

That’s why I wanna sit in the back, Justin. Without missing a beat, Justin walked away from the table.

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I realized I was rolling my eyes. That must annoy Justin. I decide to play with my Helio while Justin orders and Darren is in the bathroom.

Darren is my cousin and has been a friend since birth. I always enjoy our time together, and thoroughly love how open-minded he is.

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Though not a full-fledged metrosexual, Darren is definitely a bi-metrosexual. His emotions and demeanor could easily pass for pansy while his style and voracious appetite for pretty girls are unmistakedly and boringly straight.

He’s roughly 6’3 same as Justinskinny and fare-skinned.

He has a baby face, I think it runs in the family. He wears baggy pants with smaller fitting shirts – very straight Midwestern guy.

And the odd thing is, he wears glasses despite having received Lasik eye surgery a few years back if I had a doctor utilize a laser to cut off part of my eyeball, I wouldn’t mind it if the sci-fi sounding procedure worked.

I thought it was very cool for Darren to join Justin and I out at the gay bar, and anxiously waited for him to get back to the table.

Flo host of The Flo Show, which we were watching came on stage in her trademark red beehive wig. Her makeup was 60’s housewife and her voice was pure menthol.

Justn and Darren joined the table as Flo began her act. I sensed something bad. Then I heard Justin scream. The spotlight left Flo and immediately lit up Justin.

I instantly turned red, either from the spotlight’s heat or embarrassment. What’s yours? Justin screamed “L. Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa ah!

She continued on with her show innocently believing she encountered the last of Justin. I find time to catch a breath and I immediately begin to pick at my fingernails.

Flo is going on and on about which drag girls are performing tonight when I see Justin quickly leave our table.

Suddenly he is on stage and waving a seasoned-curly fry in her face. He wiggles the fry in front of the drag queen a few more seconds, like he’s taunting a poodle with a milkbone.

She doesn’t take, so he decides to wrap his lips around half the fry like he’s about to smoke it. I realize he is going for a Lady and the Tramp moment with her but the best he’ll get is a Mommie Dearest.

At this point, I consider my fate. Either I can stand up and walk to the bathroom right now to avoid the drag queen’s wrath, or I can sit here quietly and pretend I don’t know Justin.

The first option would be too obvious, so I stay put and try not to pee. Justin and the spotlight return to the seat next to me. Her makeup was slightly running from all the excitement.

Flo’s jaw dropped and the arm she held the microphone with dropped straight from her mouth to her side. It actually dropped fast enough to make a “whooshing” noise.

Shocked Flo came with her own sound effects. I decided to run as far away from the Midwest as possible, but was in such a stage of shock I actually was paralyzed.

I wasn’t going anywhere.

Worst yet, Justin was actually having fun with this and not realizing how badly I was dying. Darren was getting a kick out of it too.

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But his boyfriend wasn’t the one about to be murdered by a man in a 60’s style dress and makeup. The DJ finally found some ghetto ass gangsta shit.

She took off her earrings, and then lifted up each foot so she could remove her pumps. With a quick glance at her nails, Flo stomped over to our table.

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Flo sneered as she asked “how old are you? Justin then quickly admitted he was You are so immature and out of control! Do you have a boyfriend?!

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You couldn’t be in a relationship. I could see it in her face. She knew I was there with Justin and that I somehow knew him.

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I could see her thinking “he would be on my side” as she moved the microphone toward my face. She asked me, “Are you from L. I looked straight at Justin.

I love him too much to ever deny being with him.

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I hung my head in shame, seemingly saying “do what you must, I accept my fate. The audience responds and it snowballs into pure and hateful enthusiasm.

The local KC gay crowd cheers her on. My body is shocked beyond being paralyzed at this point and allows me to leave. I get up and jog towards the bathroom.

Justin and Darren stay at the table. On the way to the bathroom the bartender stops me. Just chill up here and she’ll leave you alone.

The side of the bar he is on faces The Flo Show, so I decide she could possibly come out to the bar area to continue her tirade. I notice a spot on the other side of the bar hidden by the trivia machine.

I run to it, grab the stool and calm myself down. After a few minutes, the bartender sets a bottled water in front of me and asks again if I’m okay.

I nod and start to wonder if I’m a little crazy for being embarrassed. I quickly assure myself any sober person in their right mind would have ran away the second it smelled of trouble.

I chose to wait for the guys to find me in my hiding spot. Five minutes later, Justin and Darren find me. I’m ready to go.